Thank u for ur answer, but unfortunately it did not answer my question. The thing is, that we have tried every possible way there is to satisfy me, we have talked alot about it, we read a whole lot about it, but still havent been successful. Now my husband has said that he wants me to masturbate after we have had intercourse, so that i also get satisfied, because he is not able to do so in any which way.
But my question to u is: Am I allowed to masturbate after we have had intercourse if my husband cannot satisfy me with any method at all? I have my husbands permission. The only thing I need to know, is that if it is allowed in Islam to do so if the husband is not able to satisfy his wife at all?
I hope you will be able to help me, as this has started to effect our marriage life.
Hello
I have been married for 3 years now and love my husband very much. our problem is that my husband cannot satisfy me sexually at all, not with hand or anything else. We have tried all methods but it just doesnt work. This has become a big issue in our marriage, and makes me wants to masturbate as i dont get satisfied at all. My question to you is: is it allowed for me to masturbate in order to satisfy myself to stay happy in my marriage if nothing else is working ?
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
The basic principle is that masturbation is haraam. Please
see the answer to question no. 329
That is only permitted if a person fears that he may end up
committing zina; no doubt the prohibition on zina is more emphatic, and it
is more abhorrent and reprehensible. Hence it is permissible to commit the
lesser of two evils so as to ward off the greater.
Ar-Ruhaybaani (may Allah have mercy on him) said: If a
person, man or woman, masturbates with no need to do so, that action is
haraam and he should be given a disciplinary punishment for it, because it
is a sin. But if he does it because he fears falling into zina or
homosexuality, or because he fears physical harm, then there is no
punishment.
End quote from Mataalib Ooli an-Nuha Sharh Ghaayat
al-Muntaha, 6/226
Al-Mirdaawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
We learn two things from this:
1.
That masturbation is not
permissible except in cases of necessity
2.
The ruling for women on that
matter is the same as the ruling for men, if a woman fears falling into zina.
This is the correct view, as stated in al-Furoo‘.
End quote from al-Insaaf, 10/252
Secondly:
What the husband must do is give his wife her rights to kind
treatment. One of the most important matters to which he must pay attention
in that regard is keeping her chaste so that she will not look at other men,
and giving her her rights in matters of intimacy as much as possible, even
if that means using aphrodisiacs and paying attention to nutrition.
If the husband reaches climax quickly, before his wife is
satisfied, then he has to try hard to stimulate her first, even if that is
with his hand or body, and not start to have intercourse until she is ready
for that, and then she can reach climax through intercourse.
If the question is about masturbation with the hand, what
difference is there between the husband’s hand or her own hand? Why can’t he
do that for her, and why should she do that herself?
What we think is that the husband should do that, and it is
better if it is before he has intercourse with her, then if she needs
anything else, he can stimulate her again after having intercourse, so that
her needs will be met.
There is nothing wrong with him consulting a specialist
doctor, if he is suffering from any kind of problem.
And Allah knows best.
