I have vowed that I will not marry until my mother memorises 3 ajza’ of the Quraan. This made her very upset and she did not memorise except three chapters (an-naba’, an-nazia’at, and Abas) and it is difficult for her. Am I considered a bad son as I upset her? Am I allowed to marry before she completes the 3 ajza’? What shall I do?.
Praise be to Allaah.
It is not permissible for
anyone to oblige his mother to do something that is not obligatory in
sharee’ah and causes difficulty for her. So long as your mother is not able
to memorize except with great difficulty, then you have no right to oblige
her to do that. You have to apologize to her and try to please her, and
offer kafaarat yameen (expiation for breaking an oath), because the vow that
is aimed at encouraging a person to do a specific action comes under the
same ruling as an oath (yameen). If you offer the expiation for breaking an
oath, then the vow is no longer binding, and your mother does not have to
memorize anything that she cannot.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah
have mercy on him) said, discussing different types of vows: The vow that is
made in the form of an oath to encourage a person to do something or to stop
them doing something, when the intention is not to make a vow or do an act
of worship, comes under the same ruling as an oath (yameen). End quote from
al-Mughni (10/67).
You have to please your
mother and offer the expiation for breaking an oath, and get married.
For detail on the expiation
for breaking a vow, please see the answer to question no.
45676.
And Allaah knows best.
