I try my best as a Muslim, but my husband says mean things against Islam, I try explaining things to him but he wont listen, he is educated whereas I am not, I do try and learn about Islam from the Quran and sunnah, but Im not perfect, I have 6 children three over the age of 13 and 3 under 9 yrs. how should I make myslef a better Muslim? and Instill it in my children as the older ones won’t pray all they prayers. Sometimes ok most of the time it brings me down.
Praise
be to Allah.
Firstly:
no matter how far a person
is from Islam and its teachings, there still remains in him a kernel of
goodness and natural inclination towards the truth, that needs someone to
look for it and reach it, and offer the call to faith and sincere advice.
Your husband’s education
does not guarantee that he will not make mistakes, so try to influence him
by offering advice and exhorting him gently, and seek the help of Allah, for
He will suffice you and help you. Ask Him, may He be glorified, to instil in
his heart, and in the hearts of the people around you, light by which they
will see the truth, and ask Allah to help them to follow it.
As your husband is
educated, try to provide him with academic religious books or useful
articles that are suited to his situation and the problem that you want to
solve, so that he can read them in his spare time. Perhaps Allah will open
his heart thereby. Have certain faith that Allah will never dash your hopes
or let you down if you seek His help and take appropriate measures.
In addition to that, you
could also find video and audio clips of lectures and beneficial preaching,
especially if you know that your husband has a preference for certain
daa’iyahs or shaykhs.
You should understand that
you are engaged in a great jihad, a jihad for the sake of your religious
commitment and to protect yourself, your family and your children, in an
environment that does not support you or help you to maintain your identity.
Moreover, you are striving to establish the commands of Allah with regard to
yourself and your family. You should understand that your reward will be
commensurate with your struggle and effort.
In order to establish in
your children a love for Islam and its teachings, you have to do the
following:
Give your children a lot of
your time on a daily basis, and talk to them about the greatness of Islam
and its teachings. Tell them a great deal about the life of the Prophet
(blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), for people love to hear stories.
Be very close to them, for – by Allah’s leave – your closeness will have an
influence on them, and you will be a good influence on them.
Have a board at home on
which you write beautiful phrases and religious teachings containing
Qur’anic verses and hadiths, that you change from time to time, so that
everyone in the house can read it and it will have an impact on them, in sha
Allah. This is a way of offering indirect advice.
You could also have a daily
portion (wird) of Qur’an that you read every day with your children, for the
Qur’an is light and guidance.
Try to use Islamic words
and phrases, and get your children used to words of Islamic etiquette and
adhkaar having to do with different matters, such as when eating and
drinking, or going to sleep, and so on.
And Allah knows best.
